Insomnia driving me mad last night I was forced to watch Brian Cox's wonders of the Solar System. Now Brian has a very popular following especially among the ladies of the nation, who seem to go for the whiny voice and pokemon hairstyle like excrement off a stick. I however have a very serious problem with our Brian and that is, I have a continual urge to smash his mush flat. I can't for the life of me explain why, the content of his programmes are entertaining, but I Just can't help wanting to smush his boyish good looks into a pile of red jelly. Does Brian in fact have (at least to me) Britain's most bashable face? About a week ago I was discussing my cox problem with a very pleasant lady at the local book shop, apparently she has the very same feeing about Theology Doc Francesca Stavrakopoulou who recently graced our TV screens in fascinating BBC documentary series "The Bible's buried secrets". In particular she seemed to have taken a particular dislike to Dr Stavrakopoulou's green dress (seen above) which she claimed never left her during the entire series. I have to confess to having slightly different thoughts about the Doc, very different thoughts indeed...[sigh]...Could it be that we grown adults were resentful or jealous of our better looking gender counterparts? As a younger man I was, I have to confess I was great deal prettier than now, maybe my dislike of Coxy, is that he is bloody 42 and does not look like a poorly balanced baked potato?
Even with this in mind Brian is in fact very annoying indeed and that if he says "we are all made of stars" in a wistful voice while starring at the sky once more, I swear I will hunt him down like a rabid fox and get Patrick Moore to sit on the fucker. Whats even worse is that Cox was in New Labour anthem creators D.ream, who performed ear bleedingly bad 1990's song "things can only get better" which proved to be less accurate than we all hoped.
So in summary ...successful pop career, brain the size of a planet, youthful good looks even in middle age, of course I am bloody jealous...git.